Domestic Violence – Whose fault it is?

Domestic Violence – Whose fault is it?



I consider myself to be a very strong headed intelligent girl. But still, when it came to relationships, I have been hit by my partner and have accepted it as my fate! Why? And, it’s just not me, I know various women around me who do the same. Why do we women keep doing this?


What statistic says?


According to statistic, 1 in 3 women in the world has faced domestic violence of various forms during her lifetime. This is not a very good number in the age where we think that women are emerging strong. If this statistic was not enough, then what is more heartbreaking that 54% rural and 47% urban women support domestic violence. How can we fight domestic violence when half of our women population believe that it is the right of their family members or spouses to beat or emotionally abuse them?


What is domestic violence?


Domestic violence is closely related to power and control. When a person with whom we have a close relationship tries to assert the power to control us, then it is an act of domestic violence. Most of the times, it is used when spouse/partners abuse you in a relationship. But, it can also extend to violence against children and parents. 


Types of domestic violence


Many a time, we don’t even realize that we are in an abusive relationship. It can be said that we try not to analyze those acts because of love, shame, care or just to avoid conflict. But, if the relationship ends, we then see that we were a victim of domestic violence. And, we did not speak up. 


Women should be made aware of the acts that fall under domestic violence:


  • Physical Abuse

Physical abuse is intentional harm on your body. It can be by grabbing your hair, hitting you or even threatening you. It also includes withholding of physical needs like not letting you eat, sleep or locking you in a room.


  • Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is a type of physical abuse when the act of sex is forced against your will or even when you are not in the mood. It also involves excessive jealousy resulting in falsely accusing you of infidelity and controlling your interactions with others.


  • Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse is something which we do not recognize easily. It includes acts that lower your self-esteem and self-worth. It involves public humiliation, criticizing you and neglecting your needs repeatedly.


  • Economical Abuse

If you are controlled through the power of money, then it is economical abuse. It involves having control over your finances, not giving you money for your needs and not letting you spend on what you want. If you are not allowed to study or work according to your wish, then also it is economical abuse.


We need to stand up!


So, before we try to talk sense into men, it is necessary to make our female fraternity aware that domestic violence in any form is an offense and we need to stand against it. No one has the right to slap us, even if we did something wrong. Let not your guilty conscious make you believe that you deserve it.


Every relationship is about expectation setting. If we let people have the power to control us, then they will misuse it at every level. No one has the power on you. Your mind and your body are all yours. So, next time anyone in your family setting tries to violet this fact, please raise your voice against it. We only can stop this menace against us. 


Stand up against domestic violence 

You deserve more. You deserve better. 


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3 Thoughts to “Domestic Violence – Whose fault it is?”

  1. […] patriarchal mindsets that influence violence against women. As I had just finished the article on Domestic Violence, I was really curious to know what the speakers had to share. Priya Nath and Sonam from Patna Shots […]

  2. […] पटना डाइरीज़ में, ये चाहेंगे कि आप घरेलू हिंसा के खिलाफ खड़े हों। आपमें ऐसा करने की […]

  3. […] thought, provides a dismal picture. Instead of man-woman partnership, it is based on authority and control by man over woman. Most of the women are subjugated and have to carry the burden of domestic chores, care-work, etc. […]

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